Monday, June 19, 2006

What World Progressives Say


"Bush is the most retarded worst war criminal in humankind history, but Leader Kim Jong Il is the brilliant immortal Sun of the 21st century".

--Albert Einstein on Leader Kim Jong Il

59 comments:

Defender of the Red Flag said...

This revelation is most logical as Albert Einstein, DPRK scientist responsible for all human progress, is in the appropriate position to comment on both Dear Leader Kim Jong Il and George W Bush, the unforgivable enemy of Korean people and world progressives.

Flaminsky said...

That's not possible, Albert Einstein is dead. I think you just made this up.

Richard said...

Don't you realise flaminsky, that he's only 'relatively' dead?

Duh! What kind of school did you go to?

Defender of the Red Flag said...

Albert Einstein is a senior lecturer at Kim Il Sung university, specialising in Physics and Juche. Only deluded capitalists with no sense of reality or intellegence will deny this.

6ftdeepw/KimJongIl said...

That is AWESOME!! I want to attend a class where Einstein is lecturing. We are old friends, he was my teacher back in the early 30's in Berlin (by the way, I was born in 1980). Can you please post some more pictures of the intellectual genius (KimJongIl) and Mr. Einstein in front of PyongYang University? It would be great if it was in color.

Also, is it true the Elvis isn't dead and that he moved to PyongYang to entertain the Great Leader? Please provide photos!

Kim Jon Il is a piece of shit said...

Einstein is dead, he would not even collaborate with North Korea because 1. He isnt alive in the 21st century 2. America isnt Imperialist, we are a Republic/Democracy.... Oh and by the way go stick a picture of kim jon il farther up your ass than it already is, thank you and please when you test those missles remember to aim, and remember to help the children! Even though we donated 280 Billion dollars to aid children all over the world, you seem to think we dont, and by the way, while we are donating and giving money away, you are trying to nuke Japan, have fun losing.

Anonymous said...

North Korea doesn't need to nuke Japan, America's already done that for them.

Anonymous said...

What an idiot you are. I can't stand bushy either but your lack of knowledge is obvious. N.K. is the evil and the way to deal with evil is the same as a mad dog. You destroy it, put it out of it's misery. Oh one more thing idiot, Einstein wouldn't waste a thought on your screwed up, mad dog leader.

Defender of the Red Flag said...

If that is the case why did Albert Einstein praise the Dear Leader as the brilliant immortal Sun of the 21st century, comrade anonymous???

Anonymous said...

Some of you people are so stupid. Don't you get it? Just think...

I'm glad we have such smart and brave people as dear leader to rule over us.

6ftdeepw/KimJongIl said...

Einstein left Germany cause a crazy dictator came to power....why the hell would he leave one hell hole and go to another hell hole? Did he go up there to fix KimJongIls 2nd son....I mean daughter....you know...the guys that has a vagina growing next to his Go-Chu?

Oh and by the way, Einstein has never praised the Fat Leader. Which retard told you that?

Its going to be such a sad situation for the Norks when the fatty dies and his country falls on its ass. They did nothing to educate their people and will not be able to compete on the global market because everything they learned is bullshit....poor ignorant bastards

josh narins said...

This blog is so real that it exposes the falsehoods of others.

How else can we explain that anyone would doubt the truth of Dear Leader's greatness, or that the smartest man alive would praise it.

Einstein wrote a lengthy peice called "Why Socialism?" in which he praises Kim Jong Il by name, repeatedly, as an examplar for all humankind.

For example, he writes "Man is, at one and the same time, a solitary being and a social being. As a solitary being, he attempts to protect his own existence and that of those who are closest to him, to satisfy his personal desires, and to develop his innate abilities. As a social being, he seeks to gain the recognition and affection of his fellow human beings, to share in their pleasures, to comfort them in their sorrows, and to improve their conditions of life. Only the existence of these varied, frequently conflicting strivings accounts for the special character of a man, and their specific combination determines the extent to which an individual can achieve an inner equilibrium and can contribute to the well-being of society."

and, this quote

"Kim Jong Il is way smarter than that Bush dude, duh."

Oblisk said...

Songun, please check your private message in the forum.

DPRK_follower said...

So lenient is Dear Leader Kim Jong Il that he even forgives (but never forgets) the capitalist imbeciles who insult and drag his glorious name in the mud. One day the pig american will grovel at the boot of the invicible DPRK.

Anonymous said...

With the technical wizardary of humble Korean scientists, backed by the iron will of Comrade Kim Jong Il and the immortal Juche idelogy, the glorious KPA will obliterate the imperialist Americans with 1,588 Taepodong II missiles.

Anonymous said...

BTW, Comrades, do not click on the link labelled "Kim Jong Il is a piece of [manure]". The link is poisoned. He shall pay a huge price for staining fellow progressives' computer screens under the watchful eyes of Comrade Kim Jong Il.

Defender of the Red Flag said...

I agree with Comrade anonmyous's contention that America will be pelted with exactly 1,588 Taepodong II missiles.

Such irrifutal facts of science cannot be denied. We saulute this progressive discovery!

6ftdeepw/KimJongIl said...

Actually, the lable is Kim Jong Il is a piece of shit. Not manure. Shit...straight shit!

Also, 1588 Taepodong II missles? He won't even shoot one up cause he knows that it will prove nothing. Up until the 80's, people were worried about the actions of North Korea but now, it seems as though everyone feels sorry for you guys. Hell, the South Koreans don't even want anything to do w/ you guys....isn't that sad that family looks on you w/ such negative feelings and thoughts?

KimJongIl and his father, Kim "I got a massive things sticking out of my neck" IlSung has fucked w/ everyone there and will continue to do so UNTIL you guys DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!

Jen said...

This blog is hilarious. You are very brave.

Oh yes, and long live Dear Leader Comrade Generalissimo Kim Jong Il.

George Zimmer said...

HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. ONE DAY, ABOUT A WEEK AGO, I WAS HOLDING A MEETING WITH MY COMPANY'S BOARD OF DIRECTORS, EXPLAINING THE IMPORTANCE OF DEDICATION, AND QUALITY IN THE SALE OF OUTRAGEOUSLY DAPPER SUITS, WHEN I NOTICED ONE OF THE MEMBERS OF THE BOARD WAS, IN FACT, A STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL BLOND FEMALE, HER BEAUTY MATCHED ONLY BY HER PROFESSIONAL MANNER AND ABSOLUTELY ELEGANT SUIT. THIS COMBINATION OF STIMULI GAVE MY MONOLITHIC CROTCH CANNON NO CHOICE BUT TO AUGMENT AND OBLITERATE MY PANTS. WITHIN MOMENTS MY MY MEMBER HAD DESOLATED THE BOARD ROOM, THE TABLE HAVING BEEN SMASHED UNDER THE SHEER GIRTH OF MY PELVIC PULVERISER, AND THE WOMAN IN QUESTION WAS IMPALED ON ITS GARGANTUAN TIP, HAVING THROWN HERSELF IN ITS APOCOLIPTIC PATH OF DESTRUCTION IN AN EFFORT NOT ONLY TO SAVE THE LIVES OF HER COLLEAGUES, BUT TO EXPERIENCE FIRSTHAND THE QUASI-RELIGEOUS EXPERIENCE THAT IS ZIMMER. AS MY TROUSER TRUNCHEON EXPANDED, DEMOLISHING WALLS AND DISPATCHING THE INTERNS WHO ATTEMPTED TO ESCAPE WITH THEIR LIVES RATHER THAN THROW THEMSELVES AT THE MERCY OF MY THROBBING FLESH MISSLE. MOMENTS LATER MY PHALLUS HAD KNOCKED OUT MANY OF THE BUILDING'S SUPPORT BEAMS AND THE FLOORS OVERHEAD CRASHED DOWN, THE FORCE OF THEIR MOMENTUM CAUSING THE ENTIRE BUILDING ITSELF TO COLLAPSE IN A NIGHTMARISH MANNER NOT UNLIKE A FAMOUS DISASTER FROM A FEW YEARS AGO. RISING FROM THE RUBBLE, WITH THE STUNNING BOARD MEMBER STILL ON THE TIP OF MY GOD-SHLONG CRYING ALOUD FOR MERCY, HER SUIT AS WELL AS MINE UTTERLY RUINED BY THE AFFAIR, AS WELL AS A DOZEN OTHERS STILL CLINGING TO THE SHAFT. i LET OUT A THUNDERING ROAR AND LET SPEW FORTH MY SEED WITH SUCH AWE-INSPIRING FORCE THAT THE LOAD SHATTERED THE SOUND BARRIER, VAPOURIZING MY LUSTY ASSOCIATE, CRUSHING EVERYONE IN SIGHT AND SHATTERING EVERY WINDOW IN A 5-MILE RADIUS. IN THE AFTERMATH, STANDING NAKED AND COVERED IN CEMENT DUST, AND SMILING CONTENTLY AT THE DEMOLISHED, SEMEN-COVERED RUINS BEFORE ME, I SPOTTED A SMALL DOG, STUMBING IN THE DEBRIS, ITS EARS BLEEDING AND GASPING FOR BREATH IN THE HUMID MUSK. I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF. WITH A LOUD THUD MY ELEPHANTINE MAN-HAMMER HAD CRUSHED THE ANIMAL LIKE A THICK, MEATY FLYSWATTER. I GUARANTEE IT

Fresh Prince of Bel Air said...

Now this is the story all about how, My life got flipped, turned upside down, And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air. In West Philadelphia I was born and raised On the playground is where I spent most of my days. Chillin' out, maxin', relaxin all cool, And all shootin' some b-ball outside of the school. When a couple of guys who were up to no good, Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood. I got in one little fight and my mom got scared, and said "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air." I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, The license plate said "fresh" and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, But I thought "Nah forget it, Yo home to Bel Air." I pulled up to the house about seven or eight, and I yelled to the cabby "Yo holmes, smell ya later." Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air.

Anonymous said...

To begin, this is a tale of how my very existence was twisted and transformed in a most peculiar way. Please have a seat, for I wish to take a moment to relate to you the fascinating odyssey which ultimately led to my reign as the Prince of Bel-Air.

I was sired and reared in West Philadelphia. As a lad, most of my time was spent at the neighborhood recreation center where I would laze about and relax in a most charming manner - that is, when I was not engaging my chums in a friendly game of basketball at the schoolhouse. Around this time, two young hooligans had begun to stage a campaign of vandalism and intimidation in my neighborhood. When my mother discovered I had had a bit of an altercation with the ruffians, she insisted I leave town at once and take up lodgings with my aunt and uncle in Bel-Air.

As the taxi approached, heeding my beckoning whistle, I could discern the word "FRESH" emblazoned upon its license plate, and took particular note of the pair of plush novelty dice which hung from the rear-view mirror. I was a bit taken aback by these strange omens, but quickly put them out of my mind as I cheerfully called to the driver: "To Bel-Air, my good man!"

We arrived safely in Bel-Air at dusk, and as the driver came to a stop in front of the house where I was to live, I left him with the words: "Farewell, sir. Perhaps my nostrils shall delight in your aroma once more!" To be sure, it was a long journey, and as I gazed upon my estate in all its splendor, I knew once and for all that my rightful place was on the throne - as the young scion of the great and mighty kingdom of Bel-Air!

6ftdeepw/KimJongIl said...

You see, the stories above are all accounts from the life of KimIlSung. He was once the Fresh Prince of Bel Air and he was once the CEO of Mens Warehouse....pretty much he was there when anything went down. The fall of Stalingrad...KimIlSung......the invention of the light bulb....yes you are correct....KimIlSung. The scientist that came out w/ Viagra....KimIlSung. You can't stop this man. He is there, he is here, he is everywhere. His fat-boy son is also doing things that other people are taking credit for.....Who do you think wrote all the jokes for the Dave Chappelle show? After fat-boy stopped writing the jokes, the show went to the crapper. Get it? THINK ABOUT IT. The world turns just because these fat mofo's wished it.

Anonymous said...

Einstein "died"in 1955 but he continues a quantum existence in the the DPRK. The Great Genius of the 20th century and the Lodestar of the 21st century now collaborate on a scientific breakthrough that will provide the workers and peasants of the DPRK with unlimited energy through low-calorie ginseng tonic drinks.

This one's for you, Dear Leader!

Anonymous said...

HURRAH! HURRAH! HURRAH!

We must thank our Great Comrade Kim Jong Il for the success of the recent missile tests. The rumour that the Taepodong II failed is an utter myth - just a sign of the imperialists' self-denial of their fears.

The_Missle_flew_up_Fatty_Daddys_@ss! said...

hahahaha....you wrote hurrah hurrah hurrah....that is a fucking joke. The missle failed! It failed! This is because you guys put all your failed hopes and dreams in someone that doesn't give a rats ass for you. The missle launched, it flew and crashed after 35 seconds. What in the hell does a missle do for you when it only flies for 35 seconds? You guys wanted the world to freak out and some in Japan probably did. The south koreans laughed....so did I. The guys in Korea would like to thank your fat leader for launching the missles because that just gave us job security. As long as your fatty daddy keeps these "games" going, the longer the US and its allies will continue to support their S. Korean hosts.

Oh by the way, it was cool of KimJongIl to send up some fireworks in celebration of our shuttle launch and independence day. Oh by way, how many shuttles did N. Korea ever send up? None? Its because you guys are poor. YOU STUPID POOR FUCKS!

Anonymous said...

hahaha your shitty missile failed because you use 1970s era Honeywell guidance system! That system sucked that is why we do not use it anymore. It was used for the first apollo launch when the rocket boomed and croaked the astronauts!!! You timed the missile launch to be the same time as the shuttle launch. There is a thermodynamic law that you cannot launch simultaneously two rockets, or the solid fueled one will win!!!!

HAHAHA waste so much money for a FAILURE MISSILE and then grovel on the grass to dig bugs to eat because your DEAR LEADER possesses insufficient intelligence to create a good economy.

Comparing two Koreas. I am sitting in fromt of my Samusung monitor, I want to see the north Korean LCD monitor technology. HAHA got none???

Defender of the Red Flag said...

The illguided rubbish-dwellers are advised that missile did not fail at all, but infact navigated a complete circle around the earth's circumference before droping into the east sea of Korea. This inter-planetry balastic missile technology surpassess even that of the the soviet union.

I praise Kim Jong Il for his technological genius!!!

6ftdeepw/KimJongIl said...

Defender...you really are gay! The missle did what now? Circled around the worlds circumference? Now that is truly some funny shit.

I gotta go out and tell more people about this blog...truly the highlight of my day reading this retarded shit.

hahahahah....circled the worlds circumference? hahahahhaha...truly classic shit!!

Stuart said...

Einstein rocks. Also his name means 'one stone', I believe, and stones are similar to rocks.

Anonymous said...

"Circled around the worlds circumference?"

Now only that, it did it in less than 40 seconds. Beat that, USA!

Anonymous said...

Americans are sitting here laughing at your miserable failures.

Bring it on, Dear Leader.

Ernie said...

Comrade stuart, I think "Einstein", translated, means "one beer". All the more reason why he raaawks!

Tyler said...

The whole missle debaucle just got better...

http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/asiapcf/07/06/korea.missile.us/index.html

"[The Taepodong missle] spun out of control seconds after it was launched and the North Koreans never had operational control of the missile, the official said. It failed so quickly, the official added, that the United States was never able to ascertain in what direction it was headed."

Anonymous said...

OK OK OK, before fags like the Defender of the Fag Flag and the Banner of Fagun start to bitch, yes...Tyler got the info from CNN....sure, its not as accurate as the norths SINGLE news source (you know, the news channel that has the motto: We tell you lies and you believe it). But, I trust it over anything the Fat Leader or his lil bitches would say. Yeah...they are retards. If they waited a little longer and got the technology right, they wouldn't have lost so much face. Its not that the missile failed but the fact that KIMJONGIL LOST FACE TO THE ENTIRE WORLD. You know Koreans and what happens when they lose face.

BEFORE YOU CALL ME A RACIST, I AM KOREAN!! NOT A FAG Korean, but a true Korean. A Korean that knows my history and the fuckin TRUTH!

KimJongIl should commit suicide and give everyone else a freakin break!

korea_united said...

Anonymous, you cannot be a true Korean. True Koreans are progressive minds and souls who recognize the importance of unification under the liberating banner of Juche and the benevolent might of our comrade Dear Leader.

Defender of the Red Flag said...

I also question the Korean-ness of this so called anonymous. Infact, I assert that he is a Japanese American Jewish war-criminal Satanist republican party supporter who likes to abuse human rights of childern for his own personal profit. Korean progressives do not fall victem to American lies so easily, comrade anonymous!!!

Tyler said...

I present to my fellow posters, a guide to logical arguement as prescribed by Defender of the Red Flag:
1) Listen to opposing arguement
2) Call opponent Japanese, American, Jewish, a war criminal, a Satanist, a reactionary, a republican, or any combination thereof. Mix and match!
3) You win, hands down.

Anonymous said...

Juche=Stalinism

WAR IS PEACE
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH
FREEDOM IS SLAVORY

Anonymous said...

HAIL JUCHE!

Comrade Mike said...

The whole missle debaucle just got better...

http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/asiapcf/07/06/korea.missile.us/index.html

"[The Taepodong missle] spun out of control seconds after it was launched and the North Koreans never had operational control of the missile, the official said. It failed so quickly, the official added, that the United States was never able to ascertain in what direction it was headed."


Yes, it truly does get better. Not only can the Taepodong II hit anywhere in the world, it also clearly possesses advanced AI systems which allow it to seek out and destroy its target without the need for human guidance.

Anonymous said...

impending military coup of kim jong il in north korea starts july 9, 2006

Did you know that KimJongIl's mother was actually a whore? said...

There has been some exciting development on the life of KimJongIl. It appears that his mother was a whore. I am not saying "whore" as in a promiscuous person but an actual whore.
It appears that during his struggle w/ the Japanese during the early 40's, KimIlSung came across her in Manchuria. As we all know, KimJongIl was the outcome of the meeting. I can truly now understand how must feel inside. To know that your father was once a great man (that fell all the way down to murderer) and his mother being nothing than a common whore. Poor fat, bald, short mother fucker (again, his mother was a WHORE). If you wish to view picture of the Whore that is KimJongIls mother, then please google/altavista/excite/yahoo/etc the word "goat". You will see her in her many different forms. She may look like a goat but remember...she was a WHORE!

KimJongIls mother was a whore! Defender of the Red Flags mother is a (as he would put it) Japanese American Jewish war-criminal Satanist Republican party supporter who likes to abuse human rights of childern. Also, the Defender is also able to talk about all this shit cause HE DOESN'T LIVE IN N. KOREA!!

Hero of Mt. Paektu said...

LIES, LIES, LIES. Dear Leaders mommy was not whore. You mommy was Whore in New Jersey. Do not insult Dear Leader mommy. She give birth to radiant Sun and inspirational leader of all mankind. You would be advised to appologise to Dear Leader when he come to America to give field guidance and correct opressive injustice of warmonger Bush family of imperialist opressors.

Hero of Mt. Paektu said...

Einstein is right, Bush is biggest retard of all time. He is warmonger capatalistic oppressor of the masses. He shows no regard for the people and thier puppies. He take away Korean peoples underwear and make testicles very cold in winter while him and his lackey stooge followers parade around in Korean peoples underwear and kick the peoples puppies. I hate him. But Dear Leader make love to all the people.

Anonymous said...

So what you are telling me that Kim Jong Il,rapes the North Korean People? Well at least you're being honest.

Did you know that KimJongIl's mother was actually a whore? said...

Give field guidance? Hahahahhhahaha...funny. He can't even feed his own people! Lies? You say it is lies? Then when did the N. Korean government send down group of delegates to Busan to ask for more food and materials? Doesn't this go against everything the Juche system teaches you? Doesn't Juche teach you to be self efficent? Doesn't it teach you not to rely on anyone? Then why do you ask for food? Why do you need money? If you can grow and produce everything you need in your country then why do you beg for more food?

Oh and by the way, KimJongIl's mother is a whore. New evidence says that KimJongIl may not even be KimIlSungs real son because she was not only whoring herself to KimIlSung but also to the other guerilla fighters. Yes, I agree it is very interesting but the real kicker is that she also slept w/ every Japanese officer in the area as well. If this doesn't prove that she was the biggest whore in the East then I don't know what is. KimJongIl might actually be Japanese. Look how short the fat fuck is. 5'2" DAMN!! I know women taller than that lil bitch. Again, if you wish to know what his mother looks like, please google the following words: Goat

Oh and yes, KimJongIl rapes and rapes and rapes his people. Remember, his people go through the land to find the pretties 14yr olds for his sick ass habit!

Hero of Mt. Paektu said...

You poor misguided capitalist rapist of the working people. Every progressive thinking person knows that "FAKE" South Korea pays tribute to Dear Leader for his inspired leadership.
Also everyone in the world knows your mommy was a retarded whore, she not even make any money at it.
Dear Leaders mommy is as pure as the snow on the very peak of Mt. Paektu this is proven scientific fact.

Hero of Mt. Paektu said...

p.s.
Women all over world throw self at Dear Leader because he is most virile and physically fit man of unimaginably good looks. Bush is ugly product of mongrel warmonger pigdogs and not worth a single straw sandel.

Anonymous said...

HAIL JUCHE! HAIL! HAIL! HAIL!

Don't_eat_the_yellow_snow_on_Paektusan said...

Hero of Mt Paektu: First you write (in damn near perfect english: "Every progressive thinking person knows that "FAKE" South Korea pays tribute to Dear Leader for his inspired leadership." BUT then you write (in retard english: "your mommy was a retarded whore, she not even make any money at it." Where in the hell did "She not even make any money at it" come from? If you want to sound like an ignorant moron, then write like it throughout the comment...don't just mix it up! Come on!!

KimJongil is physically fit? Well, I guess I can agree w/ that. A fat man is more fit when sitting next to a guy that hasn't had anything to eat in the last decade. KimJongIl is fat. If you can't see that then...well...I guess you got more problems than a little bit. Also, why are you checking out KimJongIl and Bush? Do you like guys? Is it your wish that KimJongIl will let you suck his lil wee-wee? Oh...by the way...your gayness is a scientific fact. Your gayness is as pure as the snow on the very peak of Paektusan. Oh by the way...you mom is whore....a WHORE...aka Butt Slut...aka nob slobber....aka Ol Gangbang!

Juche is trash! said...

FUCK JUCHE! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!!

KimJongIl is a gay wizard said...

How does it feel that your only friend in the world (China) sold you guys out and voted against you in the UN? Why didn't your Level 34 Wizard (aka...da fat one) cast his magic to make the world turn as he wants it to? You guys claim he can do so much more w/ this mellon...why can't he save you sorry bastards?

Anonymous said...

This has GOT to be a joke!

juchegirl said...

I have changed my mind about Dear Leader. The Jew scientist Einstein is much handsomer and I want to have his babies.

Peppy said...

LOL!!! This is either the dumbest propaganda ever or the best satire ever!!! HILARIOUS EITHER WAY! DO A BARREL ROLL!

Anonymous said...

Dumb fuck ! Daaaaamn U are stupid. Wake up dudes, its the year 2006, god damn you are stupid.

juchegirl said...

It is a well known scientific fact that hero of mt. paektu and inflagrasion are spies, secretly working to overthrow the crazy, short little fat man with small wee-wee and a bad temper Kim Jong Il.

Anonymous said...

Albert Einstein teaches in Pyongyang. Elvis and Patsy Klein perform nightly in the Presidential Palace. Pope John Paul II didn't die, he embraced atheism and moved to the socialist paradise of DPRK. Kim Il Sung is the greatest leader of all mankind, and DPRK is the best country in the world. IF this blog was an American TV channel it would be Fox News!